By: Sara Carpentier, MSW, RSW
Life often comes in seasons. There are times of increased stress and times of greater ease. Those periods where everything feels less stable and more unpredictable can be especially difficult to navigate. Of course, we all want to know what tomorrow will bring—there’s safety in knowing and a sense of control that comes with it. The not knowing can elicit fear.
But the truth is, we can’t predict life. Uncertainty is inevitable. We all encounter it—whether it’s a new job, a new school, a new relationship, or a new community. These transitions are impossible to fully anticipate. For many of us, the COVID-19 pandemic highlighted just how uncomfortable it feels to face a future we can’t define. So, while uncertainty is something we all experience, it can still create significant internal distress.
How can we learn to tolerate this discomfort—and prevent it from overwhelming us?
1. Accept the Unpredictability
Remind yourself that uncertainty is a fundamental part of being human. Working to accept it—rather than resist it or attempt to control the uncontrollable—can reduce your suffering. Start by recalling times when you’ve successfully managed uncertainty in the past. How did you get through it? What strategies helped you cope?
Consider the kinds of uncertainty you already tolerate, like the weather, which we accept as unpredictable. Ask yourself: How is my search for certainty serving me? What are the emotional costs of trying to eliminate the unknown?
2. Reframe the Story
What if uncertainty wasn’t something to fear, but an opportunity in disguise? Try to shift your perspective and approach it with curiosity rather than resentment. When the path forward isn’t clear, it means it’s full of possibilities.
Rather than seeing uncertainty as a barrier, view it as an open door to growth, exploration, and new experiences.
3. Focus on the Now
We’ll never be able to predict the future with perfect accuracy—so why do we keep trying? Grounding yourself in the present moment and focusing on what you can control helps break free from the stress of chasing certainty.
Use mindfulness to anchor yourself in the now. Be intentional about where you place your attention, and choose to engage with what’s right in front of you.
We can’t avoid uncertainty, and our attempts to do so often deepen our distress. Instead, let’s practice embracing it—trusting that even without a clear road map, we can move forward, one step at a time.