BY: Erica Rodrigues, MA
Teen years can be overwhelming with trying to balance school pressures, extracurricular commitments, social challenges, and parental expectations. Everyone experiences stress and anxiety when they have a lot on their plate. However, for some, it can feel unmanageable, especially if they have not developed strategies that work for them. Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) offers practical strategies to help teens face and act skillfully during stressful times. Two particularly helpful DBT skills for managing stress and anxiety are VITALS and COPE Ahead. These skills are especially useful because they combine multiple important strategies for regulating emotions and setting oneself up for success when facing challenges.
VITALS: A Step-by-Step Approach to Tackling Challenging Tasks
When emotions are high, we often want to avoid. Skipping a presentation might provide short-term relief, but anxiety or distress will likely not magically disappear the next time you have to stand in front of the class. Avoiding responsibilities can also create additional problems. The VITALS skill provides a structured way to check in with yourself, acknowledge how you are feeling, and take more manageable steps to complete the challenging task at hand:
- V: Validate your feelings – It’s okay to feel anxious, stressed, or overwhelmed. Acknowledge your emotions without judgment. This might sound like:
“It makes sense that I’m really nervous to present. A large chunk of my grade depends on it, and presenting in front of classmates has always been more challenging for me.” - I: Imagine your coping self – Picture yourself handling the situation effectively, using coping skills like paced breathing or encouraging self-talk.
- T: Take small steps – Break the problem into manageable pieces. What’s one small action you can take right now? What are the next steps you need to do to get the task done?
- A: Applaud yourself – What cheerleading statements can you say to yourself as you take each step? This can help maintain motivation.
- L: Lighten your load – Ask yourself: What do I gain by facing this? For example, completing your presentation might feel uncomfortable, but it will also give you a sense of accomplishment, fulfill a class requirement, and ease any stress coming from teachers or parents.
- S: Sweeten the pot – Reward yourself! Whether it’s a small treat, watching a favorite show, or taking a break, having something to look forward to after each step or when you complete a task can make doing it a bit more tolerable.
COPE Ahead: Preparing to Act Skillfully During Stressful Situations
Many stressors like exams or difficult conversations can be anticipated. The COPE Ahead skill builds on the I in VITALS, helping teens prepare in advance for a stressful situation so they feel more confident and in control of their emotion and behaviour during it. This involves four key steps:
- Describe the stressful situation – Be as specific as possible and focus on the facts of what you know.
- Decide which coping or problem-solving skills you will use– Write out in detail what skills you’ll use, how you’ll use them, and when. It’s important to plan for how you will manage emotions and urges that may arise. Skills may include mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotion regulation, or interpersonal effectiveness skills.
- Imagine the situation vividly as possible – Picture yourself in the moment. Experience the emotions, thoughts, or urges that may arise.
- Rehearse your coping strategies – Really try to visualize your actions, thoughts, and effectively using your skills. Anticipate potential challenges and practice how you would handle them.
Final Thoughts
Stress and anxiety are part of life, but with the right skills, teens can handle difficult tasks effectively. VITALS and COPE Ahead provide concrete steps to help teens face challenges with confidence and skill.