By Brittany Almeida, B.A.
We are halfway through 2021, over a year into the pandemic and countless restrictions. Have you been feeling like there is nothing to look forward to? Do you have little motivation to do the things that get you through the day? Feeling aimless? You’re not unhappy, but not jumping for joy every day, but just feeling a little blah? Well, I’m here to tell you that so am I!I have talked to multiple friends experiencing the same feelings, but I couldn’t find a word for what we were experiencing. Having the same routine for over a year now can start to take its toll, but I am have recently learned that there is a name for all of this: languishing.
Languishing can be described as a feeling of stagnation and desolation (Grant, 2021). Languishing can make individuals feel like they aren’t operating at full capacity. People struggle with focusing, finding motivation, and keeping up with tasks. After learning that there was a name for what I had been experiencing, I knew I couldn’t let myself continue to feel this way, so I pushed myself to find new ways to be more proactive. I will share a few things that helped me get through my “languished days”.
1. Walking! It is well-known that physical activity is associated with better mental wellbeing, but it is understandable that not everyone is motivated during these times to engage in high intensity workouts (running, strength training, playing sports, etc.). Walking has been an activity that has helped to get my body moving and clears my head, even if it is just around the block. The level of physical activity found in walking has been shown to enhance individual’s moods and improves mental health (Ettema & Smajic, 2014). Also, it was found that individuals walking in areas that had different activities going on (restaurants, shops, cafés, etc.) reported higher happiness (Ettem & Smajic). I guess living in the city may have its perks sometimes!
2. Creating better habits! I read a book called Atomic Habitsby James Clear – the aim of the book was to teach people how to create better habits for themselves and emphasizes that you are responsible for making them happen. One quote really stuck with me:
“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”
I knew if I continued to let myself languish, I would never get back to the things I once did. I understood that it was up to me to create a more productive, motivated routine instead of letting my days go by. I started forming small habits with the goal to be more activated. I resisted the urge to check social media in the morning – this helped me to get out of bed faster and begin my day. I made my bed the second I got up – making my bed right away made my space feel more organized and gave me a sense of mastery and accomplishment. I made a list of everything I hoped to get done – having the list written out motivated me to get things done and cross it off my list. I didn’t touch my phone 20 minutes before going to bed – this helped me to winddown and ensure I would get a good night’s sleep. All these little things were me taking back control of my life. Think of the smallest positive thing you can change in your day-to-day and see how it helps!
3. Maintain those social ties! COVID has made it quite difficult to see friends and families which can be hard in terms of having adequate social support. Maintaining weekly calls with a couple of friends made a positive impact during my quarantine. Talking to friends was a reminder that I was not alone about how I was feeling, and it was a helpful tool in motivating each other to keep going. Humans are social creatures who need interaction, so I encourage you to prioritize these connections during the pandemic. People are known to thrive when they experience being part of a social network which is important for functioning in daily life (Inagaki & Orehek, 2017). Receiving social support is always nice but giving social support can also be rewarding. Doing nice things for others can lead to increases in an individual’s happiness and sense of community to a social group (Inagaki & Orehek, 2017). Keeping social connections can help the feeling of desolation that comes along with languishing.
To conclude, as much as it is hard to believe; this pandemic is temporary. Languishing is an unpleasant feeling, and we need to remind ourselves that it is an outcome of our environment at the moment. Things are starting to look up, but it is still up to us to make the best of it!
Grant, A. (2021, April 19). There’s a Name for the Blah You’re Feeling: It’s Called Languishing. The New York Times. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/19/well/mind/covid-mental-health-languishing.html#commentsContainer.
Ettema, D., & Smajic, I. (2015). Walking, Places and Wellbeing. The Geographical Journal, 181(2), 102-109.
Inagaki, T. K., & Orehek, E. (2017). On the benefits of giving social support: When, why, and how support providers gain by caring for others. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 26(2), 109-113.