By Dr. Christine Sloss Ph.D., C.Psych
My family has joined the ranks of those who have adopted a pandemic puppy! With our adolescents home from school last spring, our youngest began asking persistently for a puppy. Our older two had long given up on their parents and assumed that there was no hope of adding to our family, but our third put in considerable research and dedication to the task of convincing his parents of the necessity of a canine companion.
Unbeknownst to him, we put in a deposit to reserve a spot for a puppy. After several months of waiting, we became the excited parents of an 8 week old golden doodle pup! Overnight, our family of five became a family of six, and became preoccupied by the needs and schedule of this 6 pound bundle of fur. We had to provide supervision around the clock, and quickly devoured YouTube videos on everything to do with potty training, crate training and leash training, as well as how to deal with biting, jumping, and eating any visible items of garbage that suddenly seemed to appear from nowhere. A whole world has opened up to us as we have bonded with our pup and have begun this unpredictable and delightful adventure.
I am aware that not everyone has the opportunity or the desire to own a pet, but there is much about this experience that is generalizable beyond this immediate experience. I was inspired to write about our puppy because of what we have learned thus far, and what might be generalizable and relevant to other families, particularly during the pandemic.
First, animals and young children teach us about being present. They become immersed in their current moment and activities, whether that be chewing on a stick, attacking a leaf, or playing tug of war. We could benefit from participating fully in what we are doing, focusing on one thing at a time with all of our attention and resources. When we are able to be present, we are more likely to experience fully that moment, without being distracted by our past, present or other stressors.
Second, puppies use all of their senses to take in their environment. They are mindful of sounds, smells, sights, touch and respond to anything that is unfamiliar. They experience the world with interest, curiosity and openness. When our puppy is uncertain about something, she will sit and observe it for a while, and once comfortable, will play an approach and retreat dance with this new object, until she has sufficiently explored it. We could benefit from also being mindful of our surroundings with openness and with all of our senses. If I take the lead of my puppy, I am able to adopt a beginner’s mind that allows me to be more mindful as I observe, describe and experience what I encounter around me.
Third, puppies crave companionship, and are quick to give and accept affection with those they trust. They do not hesitate to let others know when they would like to snuggle or play. During this pandemic, our opportunities for connection are unfortunately limited. Just like puppies, humans need friendship, intimacy and affection. Given the restrictions, we have to be more creative to fulfill these needs through our human and animal companions, both in person and virtually.
Fourth, puppies naturally engage in physical activity. They wrestle, romp and run around with exuberance. We can tell through their wagging tails, excited leaps and smiles, that this physical activity is not a chore to them, but a source of enjoyment. Young children also take initiative to use and exercise their bodies on a regular basis. Unfortunately as we age, we tend to feel tired and lethargic, and forget the energy and adrenalin we receive from exercise.
Fifth, puppies are balanced and know how to play hard and when to take their rest. After a play session, our puppy will collapse on someone’s lap, a favourite corner or her crate to recover. We need to learn to listen to our bodies and to give ourselves permission to flop when we also are in need of relaxation and restoration.
I realize that we do not have the carefree lives of many pups, as most of us have busy schedules and many responsibilities. However, we could strive to remember that our needs are not that dissimilar to those of puppies. We need to practice being more present, being mindful of our surroundings with our senses, approaching the world with openness and curiosity, connecting with others, engaging in physical activity, and taking time to rest.
Since adopting our puppy, I have benefitted by slowing down and taking moments just to be with her and with my family. It is not hard to be mindful when snuggling a puppy or watching her discover the world for the first time. Our new puppy has increased our responsibilities and stress, and at the same time, has enhanced our joy, gratitude and peace. We often think that age brings wisdom, and yet in some ways, the young and the animals among us have an innate wisdom regarding how to live mindfully. I encourage all of us to stop periodically and allow their outer or inner child or puppy to take the lead and be their teacher for the day.