As March break comes to an end, and the schools remain closed for at least another two weeks, I am sure that most of you are nervous about what is going to happen with your children and adolescents, particularly with no help and the closure of most institutions and activities. Some of you as parents may have to go to work and some may have to work from home, which means that you will not have much time to monitor and supervise your children. Some of you might be off work, but might be concerned about spending that much time in close quarters with your children and adolescents. I am sure that this will be a challenging time for you as families. We would like to make some recommendations to help you and your children make the most of this extra time together.
Given that people typically do not do well with lack of structure, please try to help your children and adolescents have a structure. It is important that your family maintain routines, such as wake up times, eating times, bedtimes, that are consistent with those when school is in operation. We recognize that if left on their own, most adolescents would start to sleep for much of the day and be up most of the night. It is important that you counteract this effect and help them to maintain schedules that will promote mental health and will prepare them for a return to school (hopefully soon). Continue to set limits that you were choosing to set prior to this pandemic (e.g. re substance use, curfews, aggression etc). It is important to be as consistent and predictable as possible particularly during a period of time that is so uncertain.
Guide your children and adolescents in creating balanced and varied schedules for themselves. Your adolescent and children’s week could include time for homework, practising an instrument, engaging in a hobby, reading a book, trying something new, watching documentaries, listening to educational podcasts, doing exercise, going out for walks, doing chores, cooking, looking after pets, connecting with others, practising mindfulness etc. Once they have created a daily schedule, please reinforce them with sticking to their schedules.
Take advantage of the extra time together to bond as a family. If you do not already have family meal times, we encourage you to eat at least one meal together as a family. Plan movie nights, games nights, baking or cooking extravaganzas, hiking etc together.
Pay attention to your children’s media and online consumption. Given that they have a lot of free time, it is important that you be aware of how they are spending their time and to what they are being exposed. If necessary, try to use programs that will allow you to have some control over their computer time. And do not hesitate to have wifi or device free periods in your home, despite the angry protests you might experience.
Check in with your children and adolescents regularly. Every one will respond differently to the stressors, uncertainty, constraints and disruptions caused by the Coronavirus and social distancing. Please try to validate their experiences and support them through this period of time. Share your own emotions and reactions to what is going on, while modelling effective coping, resourcefulness, flexibility and resilience during this period of time.
Make sure that you balance time together with space apart even if living within close quarters. We would encourage you to grab a shower, close a door, or get outside if you know that you need some time away from your children and adolescents. And make sure that you are in touch with other parents in your situation.
Try to take it a day at a time, staying in the present, and recognizing that this too shall pass!
Image
Klein, V. (2021). Woman with children holding phone. UnSplash. https://unsplash.com/photos/L8oEIAZ59_g.